List of Content

February 2009

Love, Fall in Love, and Partner of Life

Love and Broken Heart

In the Name of Love

Soul mate (Who and How)

Being Single?

March 2009

Seeing the Invisible

For the Love of Myself

Giving Hope, Restriction and Assertiveness

I, You, and God

Emptiness

Forever Young, Forever Beautiful

Life = Experiencing Problems

Love = Hurt?

Until Eternity I’ll be Yours

Seeing Through Unveiling Eyes and Heart

Low Self-Esteem, Arrogance, and Confidence (Trilogy-1)

Low Self-Esteem, Arrogance, and Confidence (Trilogy-2)

Low Self-Esteem, Arrogance, and Confidence (Trilogy-3)

Purpose, Vision, and Mission in Your Life (Trilogy-1)

Purpose, Vision, and Mission in Your Life (Trilogy-2)

Purpose, Vision, and Mission in Your Life (Trilogy-3)

Paying the Price

Dimensions of Sacrificing (Tetralogy-1)

Dimensions of Sacrificing (Tetralogy-2)

Dimensions of Sacrificing (Tetralogy-3)

Dimensions of Sacrificing (Tetralogy-4)

October 2010

Seasons and Learning from Esther

My Four Special Men

November 2010

Blessed to Be Blessing! (For Victims of Merapi) – Diberkati untuk Menjadi Berkat (Untuk korban di Merapi)

“Are You Jesus?”

The Race of Our Lives

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The Race of Our Lives

It is something I read from email I received. We are on the race of life. Let God be glorified through our race! Amen. Enjoy this great reading!

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The Race of Our Lives

Wanted to share something that has been on my heart for a couple of weeks. I loved horses as a little girl and would watch horse races just to see them run. At a 11 years old, a very special horse won my heart as as he walked across the screen of my TV. Told my father and brother -in-law he was going to win this race. They did not think he had a chance. As we watched the Kentucky Derby and he won, told them he was going to take the Triple Crown. Again, they said, no he wouldn’t. So together, we watched him run the Preakness, he won again. With a big smile on my face, they still said no. Now we were watching the Belmont, at 25 lengths, the horse that stole my heart as a little girl, won the Triple Crown. Yes, it was Secretariat. Had told this story, how this horse was special to me, so much to my husband over the years, for my birthday he took me to see the movie. I know now why this very special horse stole my heart. It was a seed that God had planted in me, a teaching at a very early age, that I would come to understand more much later in life. A seed that needs to planted in others, the lost and hurting. In all of the other races including the Kentucky Derby and the Preakness, he started from behind. Awe but in the Belmont, he was right up front. He was a chosen leader that started the race from behind.

You see it doesn’t matter where we get are start, it is what we do with it once we are called to be a servant/leader. Here are Words from God about our race.

Acts 20:24 (New International Version)

24However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God’s grace.

1 Corinthians 9:24 (New International Version)

24Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.

Galatians 5:7 (New International Version)

7You were running a good race. Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth?

2 Timothy 4:7 (New International Version)

7I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.

Hebrews 12:1 (New International Version)

1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.

We are all running a race and we need to run it with the heart of Jesus. Love Him with all your heart and no matter what the race you are running brings, you will do it with joy. As so many watched Secretariat run and win, so is our beloved Lord watching us. He is training us and guiding us for what ever maybe around the next corner, cheering us on. He is telling you today, I am with and you will finish. Hope you all enjoy this song and that it blesses you as it has me. The lyrics are also below it. Love to all in Christ.

It’s Who You Are

It’s not the price
It’s not the game
It’s not the score
It’s not the fame
Whatever road looks way too far
It’s not what you have
It’s who you are

It’s not how fast
It’s not how far
It’s not of cheers
It’s who you are

In darkest night
You make your sun
You choose your race
And then you run

It’s never the glory
It’s never the score
It’s not about seeing about who’s less and who’s more
Cuz when you find out how fast and how far
You’ll know it’s not how much you have
It’s who you are

You lose the moon
Then be a star
It’s not too soon
Be who you are
Whatever road looks way too far
It’s not what you have
It’s who you are

It’s never the glory
It’s never the score
It’s not seeing about seeing
Who’s less and who’s more
Cuz when you find out how fast and how far
You’ll know it’s not how much you have
It’s who you are

When you have found
How fast you can run
When you have found
Your place in the sun,
It won’t be just you that you’ll find
Has made the run and the climb
It’s everyone

It’s never the glory
It’s never the score
It’s not seeing about seeing
Who’s less and who’s more
Cuz when you find out how fast and how far
you’ll know it’s not how much you have
It’s who you are
It’s who you are

Learning to bend and not to break
Living to give more than you take
Dying to live
Living to try
Feet on the ground
Dreams in the sky

It’s never how much you have
It’s who you are

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“Are You Jesus?”

This is taken from the forward email I received. It should be our way of life and make people ask us, “Are you Jesus?” It’s such a great reading! I enjoyed it very much.
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A few years ago a group of salesmen went to a regional sales convention in Chicago . They had assured their wives that they would be home in plenty of time for Friday night’s dinner.

In their rush, with tickets and briefcases, one of these salesmen inadvertently kicked over a table which held a display of apples at the airport. Apples flew everywhere. Without stopping or looking back, they all managed to reach the plane in time for their nearly missed boarding. ALL BUT ONE !!! He paused, took a deep breath, and experienced a twinge of compassion for the girl whose apple stand had been overturned. He told his buddies to go on without him, waved good-bye, told one of them to call his wife when they arrived at their home destination and explain his taking a later flight. Then he returned to the terminal where the apples were all over the terminal floor. He was glad he did.

The 16 year old girl was totally blind! She was softly crying, tears running down her cheeks in frustration, and at the same time helplessly groping for her spilled produce as the crowd swirled about her, no one stopping and no one to care for her plight.

The salesman knelt on the floor with her, gathered up the apples, put them back on the table and helped organize her display. As he did this, he noticed that many of them had become battered and bruised; these he set aside in another basket. When he had finished, he pulled out his wallet and said to the girl, ‘Here, please take this $40 for the damage we did. Are you okay?’ She nodded through her tears. He continued on with, ‘I hope we didn’t spoil your day too badly.’

As the salesman started to walk away, the bewildered blind girl called out to him, ‘Mister….’ He paused and turned to look back into those blind eyes. She continued, ‘Are you Jesus?’ He stopped in mid-stride, and he wondered. Then slowly he made his way to catch the later flight with that question burning and bouncing about in his soul: ‘Are you Jesus?’

Do people mistake you for Jesus? That’s our Destiny, is it not? To be so much like Jesus that people cannot tell the difference as we live and interact with a world that is blind to His love, life and grace.

If we claim to know Him, we should live, walk and act as He would.

Knowing Him is more than simply quoting Scripture and going to church. It’s actually living the Word as life unfolds day to day.

You are the apple of His eye even though we, too, have been bruised by a fall. He stopped what He was doing and picked you and me up on a hill called Calvary and paid in full for our damaged fruit.

Please share this….. Sometimes we just take things for granted, when we really need to be sharing what we know…Thanks

NOWADAYS ..TOO MANY CHRISTIANS ARE NO LONGER FISHERS OF MEN AND WOMEN BUT KEEPERS OF THE AQUARIUM.

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Blessed to Be Blessing! (For Victims of Merapi) – Diberkati untuk Menjadi Berkat (Untuk korban di Merapi)

It is the time for all of us to move and become a blessing! For all of you who want to give donation to victims of Merapi, I have a friend: Nurma, whose heart are moved since her cousin in the refugee camp said that there are so many help needed: masks, blanket, tampons, and pampers. Until now, there are very limited amount of those!

So, here is the mechanism: if you want to donate please transfer to Bank Central Asia (Wisma Indocement Branch Office) with account of Tutut Nurmayanti. Number account is 4591216907. We wait for your donation until November 14, 2010 12pm Indonesian Time. Nurma will buy the masks, blankets, tampons, and pampers on November 15, 2010 and start delivering them through some transport services to her cousins in the refugee camp. She is asking several transport service right now for the information.

Don’t forget, if you have given your donation, please inform me so that I can immediately inform it to Nurma. There will be a financial report and photos too about the donations. So you can be sure that the donation can be delivered to the most needed ones.

I know Nurma since a long time ago. If you really know me, you can be sure that I will not recommend someone if I am not truly sure of him. So, don’t worry, your donation will be arrive to the needed ones.

Being a blessing is not only through prayer or through words. It is the time for us to do something! Let’s do something!

Thank you. God bless

(PS: The financial report of donation for the victims of Merapi can be read below. Thanks.

http://archaengela.wordpress.com/2010/11/06/laporan-pertanggungjawaban-bantuan-untuk-korban-merapi/)


Versi Indonesia:
Inilah saatnya kita bergerak menjadi berkat! Bagi yang mau menyalurkan bantuan ke korban Merapi, ada teman saya, Nurma, yang tergerak karena sepupunya yang ada di posko pengungsian mengatakan bahwa di sana sangat dibutuhkan masker, selimut, pembalut, dan popok bayi. Sampai saat ini masih sangat minim bantuannya!

Jadi mekanismenya seperti ini: bagi teman-teman yang akan beri bantuan, silahkan transfer ke BCA Cab KCP Wisma Indocement a/n Tutut Nurmayanti 4591216907 maksimal tanggal 14 November 2010 jam 12 malam. Nurma akan mulai membeli masker, selimut, pembalut, dan popok bayi itu mulai tanggal 15 November 2010 dan mulai mengirimkannya melalui sejumlah jasa pengiriman ke sepupunya di posko pengungsian. Dia sekarang sedang menanyakan informasi tentang itu ke sejumlah jasa pengiriman yang ada.

Jangan lupa kalo sudah transfer, beri tahu saya supaya saya bisa segera menginformasikan hal tersebut pada Nurma. Akan ada laporan pertanggungjawaban keuangan dan foto-foto juga. Jadi teman-teman bisa yakin bahwa sumbangan yang teman-teman berikan itu akan sampai kepada pihak-pihak yang sangat membutuhkan itu.

Saya mengenal Nurma sejak lama. Kalau teman-teman sungguh mengenal saya, Anda boleh yakin bahwa saya tidak akan merekomendasikan seseorang kalau saya tidak benar-benar yakin akan orang itu. Jadi, jangan kuatir, bantuan dari teman-teman pasti sampai pada pihak yang membutuhkan.

Menjadi berkat bukan hanya lewat doa, lewat perkataan. Ini saatnya kita bertindak! Mari kita bertindak!

Terimakasih. Ťuhαn memberkati.

(PS: Laporan Pertanggungjawaban Sumbangan untuk Korban Merapi dapat dilihat di link di bawah ini. Terima kasih.

http://archaengela.wordpress.com/2010/11/06/laporan-pertanggungjawaban-bantuan-untuk-korban-merapi/)

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My Four Special Men

One of leader in my ministry shared about influential person in his life. He asked us to share about impacting person in our life. Here what I will write: 4 special men in my life.

The number of 4 in Chinese culture is believed as unlucky number. Why? Since the pronounciation of 4 in Chinese Language is the same as pronounciation of the word “die” in Chinese. So for Chinese people who have a hold his culture tightly, the number of 4 is the same as number 13 for American or European, since 13 is believed as unlucky number for some of American and European.

However, for me the number of 4 shows the number of life, since there are 4 men who are very special in my life. Here are 4 men who are very meaningful and very special to make me live:

1. The first man is my father.

My father is a very extraordinary person. He is not perfect, but he is a very exceptional father.

He loves his wife and his children. He is the most influential person in my life. In spiritual area, maybe in others’ opinion he is not so spiritual. However, the values he taught, are truly spiritual.

He always teaches me about discipline, hard work, on time, do anything the best, and to to keep the honor and dignity of my name. He always says:

“We can be a poor man, but the dignity and the honor of our name should be kept well.”

He gave me last name of “Erawaty”. “Waty” is a description of a girl. While “Era” is a Sundanese Language (Local Language of West Java, Indonesia) which have meaning of ashamed. So “Erawaty” means a girl who didn’t make/bring ashamed.

He gave the last name to all of his daughters. He has a hope that all of us can be someone who doesn’t bring disgrace to the family and each of us can maintain the good name.

He is a father who isn’t egoistic. He has a hard character, however he realizes it and he can accept critics and inputs I gave.

He is a father, mentor, teacher, brother, and a friend to me. I can tell him anything. Even if he doesn’t agree with me, he doesn’t force his opinion. He always supports me.

I can be who I am today is because the love and the teaching from my father. I am grateful that I can learn about Father’s Love firstly from my father.

2. The second man is my brother.

I only have a brother. He is a good father and husband. His most influential role in my life is he helped me much when I was in the lowest point of my life.

There are only a few people who know, even my own family, that I have tried to end my life several times. At that time I feel so desperate since people surrounded me not understand me, reject and hate me. I felt so lonely. I didn’t have any purpose of life at that time and die was a good choice at that time.

I drank insecticide at that time. I drank poisonous drug too which was not for drinking actually since it’s for outside body use. I drank overdoses drugs to heal certain disease too at that time.

Thank God that He gave me a huge fear of death at that time. That is why I only drank in the insecticide and the poisonous drug in low doses.

I still remember clearly the disappointment I felt when I woke up the next day. I woke up and realized that I was still alive. I am really grateful that I am still alive now LOL!!

At that time, my brother told me to read Bible everyday. He also lent me so many sermon cassettes to be listened every day. I read my Bible and listened the cassettes everyday.

Started from it, I started feeling the recovery of my life from God. Slowly but sure, my life has a new meaning and I know God truthfully.

After that, year by year goes by. Since both of us were busy, we rarely met each other. But when we met, we shared so many things we thought.

Although I am often upset since my brother gave his input not in a way I like, I find his advise is right. It makes me grow to be a better person.

I thank God that He gave me a wonderful brother. Thank to him, I first time know God truthfully and not only because of tradition.

3. The third man is Mr. Bambang Widjaja.

First time I met him was in the church my brother and sister-in-law attended at that time. The first time I came, the speaker was him. He is the pastor of the church.

In delivering his sermon, he always preaches systematically, detailly, and easily to be understood. I have never known him personally, but his sermons for 7 years I was in his church really equip, change, and prepare me in every aspects of my life.

Although now, because of God’s guidance, I didn’t attend his church anymore, I still listen his radio program. Every morning I learn from him.

I consider him as one of my spiritual mentors. I am grateful God put me in his church for 7 years so that I can grow and to be who I am today.

4. The fourth man is Rick Warren.

I do not know him personally at all. My sister few years ago gave me a book “Purpose Driven Life” which was written by Rick Warren. It was the first time I knew the name.

Last year, one of my best friend who I firstly knew at that time, mentioned about Rick Warren’s daily devotional. He explained that to have it was free so I immediately subscribed it.

The daily devotional is very suitable with what I experience. Lots of my struggles are answered correctly. Even when I started writing, there were times when what I wrote later were similar to what he wrote later!

It makes me feel that it is a confirmation from God that it is what I should do. Through his writing, my life is changed to be better each day.

I am grateful for these 4 special men in my life. I believe you have special person who changed your life. Please don’t hesitate to share it with me.:).

My prayer for today: Thank You, Lord, for 4 special men of my life: my father, my brother, Mr. Bambang Widjaja, and Rick Warren. They are all exceptional persons. They change my life extraordinarily.

Bless them all in everything they do so that they can be Your hand to touch the life of other people. Thank You, Jesus, for Your love and Your teaching to me through them.

Amen.

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Seasons and Learning from Esther

Jackie Payette shared about the women’s retreat she attended. Here I compiled it a little. Hopefully it will bless all of you. There are two women who spoke on the retreat according to Jackie. Each of them spoke of different topic.

The first woman spoke of SEASONS in our lives. Here it goes:
1. Autumn. Autumn is as representation for what we need to let go of (it is symbolized by falling leaves).
2. Winter is as representation of the negative stuffs.
3. Spring is as representation of how His life in us brings new growth.
4. Summer is as representation of relaxing time but it is also a preparation time for what we are called to do).

So in the four seasons of our life, what we should do are:
1. Let go anything we should let go of.
2. Remove or at least minimize the negative stuffs in our life.
3. Rejoice in the growth God has brought in our life.
4. Relax but be prepare for what we are called

The second woman spoke of our being like Esther, who was called out for such a time as this. She pointed out that if we allowed Holy Spirit in, then He would do a work in us. When we look for His guidance, He will enlighten our path that we may walk in fuller power.

Furthermore, she said not to neglect our love walk with our sisters as faith will not work otherwise! She talked about when we are listening to a preacher, we should rely solely on what Holy Spirit is giving us personally. Since He will never steer us wrong.

Unity between Christians will usher in revival. She anointed all of us individually with oil and prayed over us. People were weeping and falling, inwardly many women were reached!

My comment after reading this: Wow! It is a very wonderful women’s retreat I believe. My prayer is that each of us can love our Lord more and more. Thank you, Jackie for sharing with me about this women’s retreat.

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Dimensions of Sacrificing (Tetralogy-4)

We will be discussed today about the fourth and final dimension of the sacrificing (paying the price), i.e.: God’s Dependence (Rely on God). Why is this the last dimension, but not the least? Since as humans, we tend to forget relying on God. Relying on God is a form of sacrificing, denying the flesh.

Matthew 16:24: Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.

For some people, including me, this is a difficult thing. Why so? I am among those who consistently observe, analyze, and draw conclusions based on what I observe. It is difficult for me to surrender fully.

Fully surrender is one of the proofs that you rely on the Lord. One thing I still hold on tightly is the control of situation. When facts collide with faith, that’s where the conflict begins.

This is what God asked me today: relying on God. No matter whatever situation, God’s willing I rely on Him. I believe this is also what God wants you to do.

Related to relying on God, I’ll take the fall of Jericho’s wall (Joshua 6). I am sure many of you have already known this story. However, it’s okay. I’ll repeat it here.

The people of Israel after free from slavery in Egypt, by crossing the Red Sea, they entered the desert. They continue walking to reach Canaan (the promised land) which God has promised them.

Since they did not obey the Lord and they liked turning to the worship other gods, God let them circling around in the desert for 40 years. However, as a chosen nation, God, although allow them to be forged in the desert, do not let them lack of:

- Food (in the form of manna) (Exodus 16),
- Water (which was available miraculously) (Ex. 15:22-27, 17:1-7),
- Protection (in the form of an angel who walked in front of the Israelites) (Exodus 23:20),
- Good weather (the pillar of cloud so they were not too hot in the daytime and a pillar of fire for lighting) (Exodus 13:21),

- Clothes and footwear that were not damaged during 40 years (Deuteronomy 29:5). Imagine if there was a garment and footwear factories that made clothes and shoes/ sandals like that.

The people of Israel actually did not have to wandering in the desert for 40 years, if only they were obedient to God. Unfortunately their heart tended in the Egypt which they left behind. Egypt talks about carnality.

Although the Lord has freed people of Israel from Egypt, their hearts were still attached there. It’s like God has freed us all from our sins, but often the temptation of Egypt (flesh) drag us to sin.

Imagine someone who had stranded in the desert for 40 years. Then finally there was the day Israelites crossed the Jordan River to reach the Land of Canaan, the land which they desired for 40 years. This is the same with us when we want something badly, after waiting for so long finally reached the day.

In the midst of joy to receive the promised land of God, somehow the beautiful country had been occupied by other nations. It happened because Israelites was too hard-hearted. They did not want to obey God, so that eventually the empty Promised Land was occupied by other nations. To occupy the land of Canaan, Israelites needed to occupy a number of cities. The first city to be occupied was Jericho.

Jericho’s conditions was written in Joshua 6:1 and 6:5. It was a town surrounded by defensive walls and a gate as an entrance. If you often watch war movies, it is a usual condition for you. It’s a common thing for the defense of a city/area to establish defensive walls.

I found interesting things in Joshua 6:2-5. God wanted to hand over Jericho, however in a way that was not common for human thought. God told Joshua that he and and all of the soldiers had to walk circling the city of Jericho one time and this was done for six days. On the seventh day, they had to walk seven times circling the city and the priests had to blow the trumpets. When the sound of the trumpet sounded loud, the entire Israelites had to cheer loudly, and the walls of Jericho would crumble.

How strange it was, wasn’t it? Even it was so absurd! Yes, anything that exists in the mind of God is very different from human thought. Another interesting thing is written in Joshua 6:6-21. What God commanded in Joshua 6:2-5 was carried out by Joshua and the entire Israelites. The end result was they could take over the city of Jericho.

Several things we can learn about relying on God in the crumble of Jericho’s wall:
1. God’s way is not the human’s way. His design is not human’s design.

Isaiah 55:9: “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

God’s way sometimes bizarre and absurd. What was the connection between walking circling of city of Jericho and on the seventh day after hearing the trumpet’s sound, the whole nation had to cheer loudly?

It was very unreasonable, wasn’t it? Men should go to war with swords, machetes, guns, pistols, rifles, grenades, dynamite, nuclear, or even chemical and biological weapons. Right?

However, when we rely on God, God sometimes gives way outside the human sense. When we rely on ourselves, we should pour out all of strengths, strategies, troops, weapons, and logistics to be able to win the war. The result is we can win or lose.

However, when we do what God asked and we rely on God, it is God who will fight for us. Praise the Lord! First aspect of relying on God: believe in God’s command and will, although sometimes it is beyond human sense.

2. Relying on God doesn’t mean passive. It doesn’t mean desperate. Relying on God is  active and dynamic heart attitude. In Joshua 6:21, besides what had they done, they didn’t stop until the crumble of Jericho’s wall. The Israelites climbbed it, went ahead, and took the city. It was a war. The second aspect of relying on God: actively do our part in accordance with the direction and guidance of God.

3. When Joshua listened God’s strange and unreasonable commands, he did not turn to other gods who might be able to give more senseable answers.

Sometimes when we pray and we doesn’t receive God’s answer, we become desperate, frustrated, disappointed, angry and maybe think that God does not hear our  prayer, that God can not be relied upon. Furthermore, we ran to the other gods. It is a huge mistakes!

1 Samuel 12:21: Do not turn away after useless idols. They can do you no good, nor can they rescue you, because they are useless.

Do not run to other gods who promise to help us. Those are the idols that will bring curse and misery in our lives.

When God asks for a sacrificing, He will return it and bless us more. However, Evil also imitates it. He asks for sacrificing too and as if he gives what we asked. However, Evil is not God. After giving what we asked for, he will demand more from us. There are too much heartbreaking story associated with this. Do not let this happen to you!

Zechariah 10:2: The idols speak deceit, diviners see visions that lie; they tell dreams that are false, they give comfort in vain. Therefore the people wander like sheep oppressed for lack of a shepherd.

Do not go to the soothsayer and the oracle. It is evilness in the eyes of God! Be careful! It’s not blesses you get, but curses instead. Maybe just for a moment as if you got the blessing. However, in the end it’s curse you get.

Do not believe all forms of soothsayer’s work: zodiac, feng shui, and so forth. The third aspect of relying on God: do not turn to other gods, but focus only on God.

4. Joshua did not rely on the power he had, i.e.: relying on the number of soldiers, weapons, or the experience, knowledge, and strategy of war he had. No! Joshua obeyed God’s commands. Joshua kept holding on God’s command, not his own strength.

Isaiah 31:1: Woe to those who go down to Egypt for help, who rely on horses,      who trust in the multitude of their chariots and in the great strength of their horsemen, but do not look to the Holy One of Israel, or seek help from the LORD.

Further in

Jeremiah 17:5: This is what the LORD says: “Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who depends on flesh for his strength and whose heart turns away from the LORD.

Even in

Ezekiel 16:15: “But you trusted in your beauty and used your fame to become a prostitute. You lavished your favors on anyone who passed by and your beauty became his.

Remember, do not rely on ourselves: on our strength, intelligence, ability, wealth, power, beauty, and so on! Rely on God! Fourth aspect of relying on God: do not rely on yourself.

5. Joshua can safely move since he knows that God can be relied upon. He is a trusted God. He believes because he has experienced God’s own figures.

Jeremiah 17:7: “But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him.

Yes, this is God’s promise. God has never failed to keep its promise. He can be relied upon. He always hears our prayers. Moreover, He always answers our prayers.

The answer from God may take the form of three answers:
a. “Yes”, that God gives what we ask.
b. “No”, that God does not give what we ask.
c. “Wait”, that God gives what we asked but not now.

When God said “No”, it does not mean God does not answer our prayer. He knows the best for us. If God answers “No”, it means that God knows if He gave it, it would be damaging, dangerous, even deadful for us. He is a good heavenly father.

If he knows something that is dangerous for us, He won’t give it to us. He’s willing to have risks to be hated by His children. Here, there’s our maturity required to understand it.

As a parent who will refuse to give their children sweets constantly because those will damage the teeth of the children, God only thinks about our good.

When He said “Wait”, it does not mean God can not deliver what we ask now. Do not misunderstand! He is unlimited. Before you ask, God has already known your requests. He knows our needs more than ourselves. He is omniscient God.

The same with the answer “No”, the Lord only wants the best for us. When God said “Wait”, it’s because he knows the right time for us to accept it: when we are ready to accept it. Meanwhile, before we accept what we asked for, God prepares, forms, and processes us. The fifth aspect of relying on the Lord: trust and believe in the goodness of God, whatever his answer it is for our own good.

I’ll end today’s article with a small testimony. This is a testimony that I liked. Maybe some of you’ve also heard it from me. My testimony relates to a pink umbrella and crabs.

Here goes the story. I have several folding umbrella which I generally take it every day in my bag. One day I was using a pink shirt to the campus when it rained. I opened up my umbrella and then I noticed my umbrella’s color is blue (my favorite color hahahah). Then I thought to myself, “It’s blue. It doesn’t match with my clothes’ color.”

Sometimes I like to match the colors of clothing with umbrella I bring. So if I wear black clothes, I carry a black umbrella. If I wear blue shirt, I’ll bring blue umbrella hahahaha. It was already forgotten just like that.

One day my eldest sister called me. She said, “San, do you want folding umbrella? I’ve just bought it. I bought it half dozen since it’s the requirement from the seller.” I only answer, “Yes, please.” When the shipment arrived (because my sister lives in other town),  I received a pink umbrella. Incredible, isn’t it?

The second case is about the crabs. Besides noodles, I really love eating crabs, especially if it is made by my mother. For your information, my mom is the best cook in the world! She is very good in cooking.

One time after a long time I did not eat crabs, it suddenly flashed on my mind, “Gee it’s been a long time I didn’t eat crabs.” That’s all. I did not do anything afterwards. Because the crab is not cheap, I did not ask it to my mother. After all, I won’t die if I  do not eat crabs, will I?

Do you know what happens? Few days afterwards, my mother suddenly said, “I buy crabs today since it’s cheap. What kind of cook do you want?” Hallelujah, praise the Lord! Incredible!

Do you know why did I share these two little testimonies? Pink umbrella and crab are only my desires. I did not ask, let alone pray hahahahah.

It’s very far from it. I’m just wondering about it in my heart, however God knows and God hears. If I didn’t have pink umbrella or crab, would I die? Obviously I won’t. I have a lot of umbrellas I can use and I can eat other things as substitute to crab. However, why did the Lord give me? It’s merely a desire, it’s not a need.

From those two events, I think that God knows my tastes just right. He really knows and appreciates it. He loves me so much, so that He cares even for little things, let alone my needs, especially the big things that I pray.

I do not mean to suggest that small things do not need to be prayed. My point is that God understands whatever I want, let alone my needs. If God loves me so much, I also believe so does with you. What do you pray? What do you want? Rely on God! Be assured that God will provide, not only what you asked for, but also more than the best that you requested.

Amen.

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